I woke this morning, went on a walk with Max and Bodhi, and out to breakfast with Claire and Mark. It has been a great day. Even though the weather in Phoenix refuses to simmer down, we’re finding ways of coping. The air conditioner has only quit on us once, so I consider that a blessing.

My heart and mind has been focused on friends in Mount Shasta and the relentless fires and smoke that have plagued that region of the country. Though we left Mount Shasta before the first fire, I’m still checking fire updates daily and checking in with friends who are suffocating in the blanket of smoke. God, how I remember. It was last summer’s smoke that drove me to finally capitulate to the idea of moving from the place I love so very much. 

Last summer. Alex was sick, suffering through the last stages of lymphoma and my inability to let go and give up the fight. The smoke came in, and he was horribly affected. It was one year ago today when he couldn’t hang on any longer. 

Such a good day today with those I love in this new place I call home. And yet, I still remember and long for the days of bliss in my meadows beneath the sleeping giant. Those days are gone, for now. 

Alex walking with me through our forested neighborhood in Mount Shasta, California in his healthier days.

That happens, you know? We have these really amazing experiences in our lives and we’re driven to keep those experiences alive, while at the same time life tugs us forward in directions away from the past. Life must go on, we must continue to grow and expand, and yet we don’t want to forget. 

We mustn’t forget. 

These children of mine keep growing and evolving, my career keeps growing and evolving, my relationships grow and evolve. It’s all on its way to something else, nothing stays the same. Even WordPress is changing into something different. To stay alive, we must continue to grow and expand.

And yet, we’re somehow becoming more of who and what we are.

Similar Posts